Kurt
Hernon:
January,
2002
Best
of 2001: How to Cop Out and Buy In: A Lemming's Guide
Hey
pops, whatre you listening to?
Its the Manchester Happening.
The who? Or what?
The Manchester Happening.
Uh, hey pops, forgive my ignorance, but who the hell
is the Manchester Happening?
Well sonny, Im glad you asked. The Manchester
Happening were three young skiffle players from the late 50s
and the early 60s. They werent all that famous,
but this here record, The Neat Beat Goes On, was supposedly
one of my favorite records in 1960. In fact, I think it was
the one I called the record of the year.
The Manchester Happening huh? Well are they any good?
Do you still listen to the record much?
Nah, this is probably the first time Ive heard
the damn thing since 1960. And its really a pretty awful
fucking record. Christamighty, what was I thinking?
Heh, so much for record of the year huh old man?
Yep, it just goes to show you, you can never trust a
critics end of the year best of list
theyre
filled with messy stabs at hipness, credibility seeking mumbo
jumbo, and a serious dose of blowhard ego. And its that
last word - that little three-lettered one - that usually
makes these list things a huge provincial mess. One-upsmanship
of the most obscene order.
Like the Manchester Happening, eh pops?
Yeah, like the Manchester Happening. Good God, just
listen to this shit will you?
Oh, I hear it old man
I hear it.
Its so awful. Someone should have stopped me.
They really should have done whatever it would have taken
to shame me straight because this shit is downright embarrassing.
Yeah, but Im sure you picked some winners that
year too pops.
Not many kid, not many
at all
ever
The
List: 2001
Everyone wants my list. Its not only my list that they
want - they are asking the deed of others also - but I always
feel a little funny when someone wants mine. What the hell
do I know about whats supposed to be good, or conventionally
hip? Not much, thats what - at least when were
speaking in terms of apparent mass critical appeal. But hey,
who am I to grind away at the handbrakes of progress? So,
although it seems that most rockwrite types will, at some
point or another, proclaim a disdain for this sort of exercise
(a statement that approximates something like this has accompanied
nearly every solicitation for this years list: Its that
time of year again! Although we here at ______________ dont
care much for year-end ranking of records, the readers demand
it. So please, fill out the enclosed form by listing your
top ten record -the records you consider the best - for the
year 2001, in order of preference ranked from 1 to 10. Feel
free to include a short write-up on each selection) the truth
of the matter is that we all eventually drop the phony piousness
and get around to making our year end best of
lists because, after all, if we are to be honest with ourselves,
well admit that its a fucking mongo-charge to
present your selections, your proclamations of grandeur, to
the hungry masses - as though the list you make is some kind
hidden nourishment. The key to post-cultural enlightenment!
As if the self-proclaimed ten or fifteen lousy best
or favorite records of some Godforsaken soon-to-be-long-forgotten
critic and annum would matter to every - or anyone - else.
Unequivocally! Of course!
That said the annual best of list has become a
rock writers signature of sorts. Its a chance
to lay it - and yourself - out there. A chance to brood over
a years worth of music and to craft a list filled with overbearing
blowhard pomposity in a fruitless and pointless reach for
some kind of hip credentials and/or credibility. It is the
spotlight baby! And its the moment of any given year
that a - gulp - critic can use to define and shape (or redefine
and reshape) his very own celebrity aura.
Or, maybe its just a realistic chance to be honest with
folks and tell them what you listened to all year.
Naaah! You gotta go for the gusto!
Your
List: an exercise in honest futility, or, how to cop out and
buy in.
This is your BIG chance kiddies, so listen to this old man
closely. If you wanna be cool, if you wanna be hip, and if
you wanna be part of an elite club of fast-living and hard-partying
rockroll dweebs then the best of list is the grand
opportunity to display (and, if need be, invent) all of the
rockroll savvy that youll need in order to get by in
this wicked rockroll world for the next twelve months AND
gain the nodding approval of your fellow rock scribes.
Just remember - your list is your ticket to acceptance! What
you have here, with your year-end best of list,
is a swell opening, an unbelievable chance to stack your tastes
up against the giants of the music crit industry! So dont
blow it with a worthless list of records youd actually
listened to all year! Grab the bull by the horns on this one,
do some research and find out whats hip! Discover what
music had all of the more famous and influential critics going
ga-ga, and then get your little amateur hands on those records,
buy yourself a few gallons of beer (which you may need desperately
considering recent years critical faves - Kid A? come on,
thats a six pack in and of itself), and then struggle
your miserable way through each and every one of them. When
youre through and you can honestly say youve actually
heard these records in question you too can get on with your
list!
But dont go out and find the consensus top ten and just
duplicate it. No, no, no! What you have to do, and this is
where it gets a little tricky boys and girls, what you have
to do is figure out which four are five are the absolute favorites
of the cognoscenti. Sometimes this is easy because the year
in question may dwell strictly on one distinct record. 2001
seems to be one of those fortunate years. And while I dont
want to give it away (Id like for you kids to have to
do something for yourselves) Ill tell you that its
a band which has a name that starts with an Str
and ends with an okes. And while the temptation
may be to place this record at the top of your list and then
proceed with a few of your own selections, this is neither
an appropriate nor savvy move.
The best way to approach a season in which there is one clear-cut
best record is to follow the lead of the more
notable and esteemed critics out there and use three or four
(or maybe even five if youre not comfortable with, or
are perhaps embarrassed by, any of your choices) of the other
consensus picks (there are usually at least four of them out
there - such is the singular mind of the critical body) to
beef your own meager tastes up. Toss the obvious singular
and critically much-hyped sucker smack dab into its proper
slot at the very top of your list (the #1 spot), pepper the
remainder of your list with the three or four other records
that you and your rockcrit buddies have reached an astonishing
critical concurrence about, and then round it out nicely by
tossing a few eccentric and quite possibly one (and only 1!)
of the records that youd actually liked and listened
to over the past twelve months. Viola! Youre a rockwrite
year-end top ten expert!
But what about those other choices - those eccentric
ones youd mentioned? Wont those make or break
me? Wont the give me away? Arent those going to
need to be acceptable in some small way? And the answer to
this is - YES! On all fronts. What youve asked could
happen (although most of the folks who read your list will
be other rockwrite types who will most likely scan your list
for the comfort of those familiar few records - the ones they
loved too!), and I would rather it not happen
to a student of mine. So
I have here a final little lesson,
one that will put you fully into the elite class of critical
top ten list creators. Listen to me closely now little ones.
What you have here with those precious opening slots in your
list is a splendid opportunity to reach way down into the
depths of obscurity for a few titles that will just boggle
your peers, not to mention your newly acquired admirers, minds
(and probably your own too!). If you carefully follow this
bit of advice youll be displaying an uncanny critics
willingness to try new music and a dedicated wherewithal to
dig into the most sub subterranean underground for sounds
unknown to most. A very hip move indeed!
You can also exploit one of your ranking slots as a king hell
opportunity to show some startlingly impressive range and
diversity. Try placing some semi-hip, cult, avant-jazz record,
or something akin to the hypnotic and repetitive drone of
world music on your list. The more obscure and
repressed the artist, the better youll look (try mining
for some kind of Afghan folk-politic tunes this year). Or,
and this can be a very dangerous move if not done with the
appropriate tact, you can demonstrate real hip tolerance with
the kids of today by reaching into big money pop culture for
a slab of multi-platinum acceptability (this is accomplished
by digging around for some way to claim that, say, In Syncs
Celebrity was not really the vacuous bore it seemed, but rather
was actually a pretty good record that had some significant
musical moments and displayed real growth).
Your list can also be a great opportunity to bend your guilty
pleasure for some aged rock outfit that youd loved as
a kid into a sort of critical adoration gone amuck - even
though said band may be, in all honesty, washed up, pointless,
and far, far gone into the rockroll netherworlds (think Aerosmith:
for some reason its actually safe in some quarters to
approve of the sewage-pop they pour out these days - and Id
bet you can trace it all back to some crits savvy best
of somewhere).
Oh! There are so many moves to be made; there is so much posturing
to be had, and so many reputations to build! With a year-end
top ten anything is possible!
Possibly
improbable: a trip back to Reality
Possible? Yes, but surely and sadly improbable. Because in
the realm of so many possibilities, in a world with so much
music and so many different people writing on and about it
all, these rites of passage, these moments spent in the bright
shining rockwrite sun, these shots at critical immortality
known as the year-end best-of list always inevitably end up
collapsing on themselves in an sad exercise of mass critical
exaltation.
What could and should be a substantial discourse on the varied
sounds of our day winds up as a blowhard cozying of likeminded
(or wanting to be likeminded) hipsters and tastemakers.
Its all lemmings meeting the lemmings when these lists
start to appear; an endless parade of supposed musical minds
stumbling over each others opinions only to wind up
in comfortable concurrence, ultimately finding a weird, tiresome,
and wholly phony consensus.
Anything is possible - but again, with the way things are,
highly improbable.
My
List (you know its what you came here for)
Working from a master list of this past years discs,
Ive been churning out years end top ten
after top ten lists since Thanksgiving for a variety
of friends and foes at such an alarming pace that I figured
I couldve only be faking it. But I do it anyways, feeling
every bit the phony Ive just described. Sure, I have
reasons - my reasons - that these selections are on my list
and they may be many both good and bad, but I can only hope
that the best, most important of those is the fact that these
are the records I have listened to the most this past year.
These are the discs that gave me a honest-to-goodness enough
of something that Id found myself returning to them
long after their initial highs had long worn away.
Music is funny that way, and it is a particularly peculiar
entity in the processing of it for reportage. Its a
potent aphrodisiac that can burn with the captivating brilliance
of the brightest and fastest of falling stars - and can fade
and be forgotten just as quickly. Todays favorite becomes
tomorrows forgotten. Its as much the rule of the
rockroll jungle as it is the rule of the bubblegum pop, hip-hop,
and the cozy top forty pop worlds. It is the hard fast rule
that always holds true. The top ten of today, the best of
this year, and the favorites and the fads of our moment all
become the ether of rock and rolls tomorrow.
Sounds pretty bleak and downright negative doesnt it?
Like this whole rockroll thing is just one great big whatsthepoint
bummer? No! It is absolutely not - or at least it shouldnt
be. It doesnt have to be. Because, you see, the fun
in this all is found when the ones that got away are found
once more, and when the ones that can hold their own prove
themselves again and again over time. The true sport of this
chase is in the finding out which ones those are.
So here we are at that time of year where the trivial hopes
of a rockroll junky should be boiling over, the time of year
that every other rock and roll freak will, in theory, slap
together his or her list of favorite/best of records for the
previous twelve months and share them with the world. All
of the stuff never heard, the sounds unknown, the picks and
pans of so many other music nuts that one could spend the
next twelve months exploring their options. Oh joy!
No, no joy. Because you and I both know that this annual end
of the year list-making exercise delivers nary a crumb of
what it promises. In fact the whole ordeal usually tends toward
such a coronation of one-mindedness that each and every list
that I see starts to sour me on the whole rockroll hegemony
ideal. Oh there are those that do the work they are supposed
to do, but on the whole these things have become monotonously
predictable and slanted heavily toward the ultra-hip concurrences
of a few influential bozos.
So, with that in mind, we can already deduce that the mindless
masses will, for reasons still entirely perplexing to myself,
lean heavily on a record like, say, well, take the yawn inducing
Strokes record for instance - because it obviously is, without
question, the critical rock and roll event of the year. God
forbid you miss this bandwagon buddy. There are the others;
some will jump on the White Stripes, a terrific band to be
sure, one record too late, and youll still find a healthy
crowd out there waving the Radiohead banner (of which I dare
anyone to admit to having listened to Amnesiac more
than a half dozen times this year without the mind-numbing
assistance of an illicit prescription medication). It is all
so hopelessly predictable, very nearly unbelievable, and sadder
than either.
But move on we must. And if all of the others are going to
release their concurrent chorus of hallelujahs and amens
- for whatever their reasons may be - then the rest
of us will have to try the more useful approach - honesty.
That is what we have here in my collection of records that
really got me going at some time or another this year - a
hopefully honest listing of records that I actually listened
to more than just a few times. These are the ones that sounded
damn good, that made me feel good, the ones that gave me pleasure
and often left a smile on my face. This is the music that
I actually liked. Not the stuff that I think I should have
liked, nor the stuff that I think will make others like me
because I liked it, but the stuff that, damn critical hipness
to hell, I actually wanted to hear most of the time this year.
THE
FAVES: Records, songs, and whatnots
Uptown
Sinclair - Uptown Sinclair
(d-Text): This one pretty much took the whole damn cake for
me this year - in part because, sure, I know the guys personally
(although I didnt before hearing the disc) and partly
because theyre amiable as hell hometown boys. But this
is music, not politics or sex (although songwriter Dave Hills
songs effectively mimic the very groove and idea - the essence
so to speak - of sex), so I mostly listened to this set of
tunes more than any other because this record, to put it mildly,
is so goddamn good. I truly cant recall a platter that
pulled so many smiles from my undesirable mug so many different
times. Its as smart, witty, and terrific a sounding
rockroll record - all painted up in anxious pop colors - as
Ive heard in many a year.
The
Bigger Lovers - How I Learned to Stop Worrying
(Black Dog): Hard to peg why but this record sounded even
better for me after seeing the band do the songs live. Thats
not to say that it wasnt a striking listen right off
- because it was. But after the live gig I think I finally
got it - all of it (the record is a production
of colliding collage pop, the live show a roar) - and I never
put the record away for the rest of the year. Oh, and sure,
once again, I met, sorta know, and like these guys. Is it
a rockroll crit crime to like the people who make the music?
Mark Mulcahy - Smilesunset
(Mezzotint): Every time I listen to this, and I have listened
to it many, many, many times, I shake my head in disbelief
or
is it awe? Whatever. This is a wonderful, wonderful, spectacular
record and Mulcahys voice is the absolute miracle of
our musical times.
The GC5 - Horseshoes and Handgrenades
(Leprock): Theyre local (Ohio) to me (I dont know
them and am not even sure if theyre still around the
area) but all-world on this fortunate return of punk from
it recent mainlining pop slumming to its real rock and R&B
(not meaning the real R&B - but that spirit:
rhythm and blues) smarts. What pulled me in was the Bastards
of Young cover, what kept me there was their contagious
left-leaning working mans stance, that and the utter
realness of these guys and this oh-so welcome soul-punk sound.
Steve
Wynn - Here Come the Miracles
(Blue Rose/Down There) - Id spent a fair ammount of
time in Orange County, California as a kid. Had some family
friends we used to stay with out in Fullerton and when I was
in my early teens we went there to spend a summer finding
my oldest brother a job and place to live. I spent my time
there reading music zines, looking for a girl whod look
back at me, and riding the bus to Huntington Beach and back
- just to have something to do. I first heard Dream Syndicate
that summer, and coincidentally wound up living in Southern
California myself from 1984-87. It was in fits and spurts,
but eventually Id discovered the California that Wynn
sings about on this record. So, aside from the mutual adoration
for Mott the Hoople, Lou Reed, and rugged guitar noisecapes
that Wynn and I apparently share, he has a similar place in
his heart for the mysterious California as I, Raymond Chandler,
Nathanael West, and so many others have over the years.
Ken
Stringfellow - Touched
(Manifesto):
I unabashedly adore the Posies Dear23, and it usually
winds up on any list I ever make of my so-called all-time
favorites. And while I always got a kick from the other
Posies records, this Stringfellow record (as did Auers
6 ½ ) feels more like Dear23s heir
than anything else done by these twin talents.
Nick
Lowe - The Convincer
(Yep Roc): Id always figured that Nick Lowe would be
the one who got to aging gracefully in rock and roll first,
and he certainly has. That this implausibly soulful record
doesnt come across as mind-blowing astonishment is the
truest testament to Nick Lowes talents - after all,
hes been making the impossible and improbable sound
ridiculously easy for thirty plus years now.
(song)
The Walkmen - Weve Been
Had: It may be the smartest song Ive heard
this season. Theyve sold and sold and sold to us, and
to what end? Its in the realization that youre
only being trend-fucked at every marketable turn that youll
finally jump out of the game and go your own way. You just
have to get there first. Probably the only song I truly wish
that Id written.
The
White Stripes - White Blood Cells
(Sympathy for the Record Industry): Im a fan - a big,
big, big, big fan (once drank from Megs Jack Daniels
bottle - God bless the girl!) and whats wrong with that?
This one is not their best in my book - last years De
Stijl was, is, and always will be the immortal Stripes
to me - but Blood Cells is pretty goddamn terrific
nonetheless. And the only way to know, really know the Stripes
is to catch them playing live, thats where Blood Cells
thrives.
The
Beers - Beers Hotel
(self-released): Some cats in the St. Louis area slipped me
this thing - a self-burned disc of some of the best return-to-the-80s
indie type rock Ive heard since indie rock reigned in
the 80s themselves. This thing gets played and played
around my place because its so nostalgic and fresh and
- oh yeah, weird.
(song)
Clyde Wrenn - Sawdust in the Mash:
Wrenn has an otherworldly vocal delivery, sort of the complimentary
opposite of the aforementioned Mulcahys. The best thing
is, he uses it to top off his enormous and dramatic readings
of the abstruse and poetic songs that he writes. For me Sawdust
might be his finest.
Whiskeytown - Pneumonia (Lost
Highway): I love this band, and I am bitter with Ryan Adams
that it no longer exists (whose fault is it anyway?). So,
while Adams Gold record is garnering him his
just praise, Im ignoring his solo work and listening
to this one over and over. Damn, damn, damn!
Sinomatic
- Sinomatic
(Atlantic):
This one got here because an acquaintance was affiliated with
the band and wanted me to listen and let them know what I
thought. I listened and found some really terrific songwriting
on a pretty damn good mainstream aimed rock record. I met
lead singer/songwriter Ken Cooper and told him that I thought
the bands song Leave Me Tomorrow was as
near a perfect rockroll pop ballad as any Id ever heard.
Even now, stone sober, I still think that.
Ian
Hunter - Rant (Fuel2000):
Ive already and often confessed my affection for all
things Ian Hunter. Rant is no different - and feeling awful
and slighted that Hunters last two efforts got so overlooked,
this one was bound to be here. That and the fact that it stayed
in my car stereo for over a month.
Joe
Henry - Scar (Mammoth):
Thanks to a friend/writer down in Tennessee I picked this
utter gem up on what felt like a challenge. My friend e-mailed
me something to the effect of I know you dont
really dig Joe Henry, but his new one is pretty good.
Ha! Me? Dont like Joe Henry? It worked - I went right
out and bought it. And now all I can say is, whats not
to love? Jazz undertones, 1970s iconography, a song
that sis-in-law Madonna warped into a kinky hit, and a swell
Ornette Coleman performance
perfect. Thanks friend.
Jon
Auer - 6 ½
(Pattern25): Its a collection of cover tunes that, as
Stringfellow also accomplished this year, sounds much like
the best of the Posies. Auer does justice to every thing he
touches here - even a Psychedelic Furs smash.
(song)
Bob Dylan - Mississippi:
Even though Love and Theft was an overall bore Dylan still
has the occasional jaw-dropper in him. This one not only sounds
good, it feels the most honest. I just wish hed had
at least one more like this.
The
Bicycle Thief - You Come and Go Like a Pop Song (Artemis):
Its a year old record that I didnt know about
a year ago (and may not have entirely known it was my hero
Bob Forrests band had I heard of it), but it qualifies
because it was picked up and released anew by a bigger label.
I can relate to nearly every last word on this one. And if
the Thelonious past is any premonition than this one will
be played for years to come.
Kevin
Salem - Ecstatic
(FutureFarmer): Yeah, this is the guy who was in Dumptruck
during the for the country era, and being that I still think
of Dumptruck as one of the great overlooked bands in recent
history I tend to follow the guys whove played in the
band wherever they go. This time Im damn glad of my
mindless fandom because this thing is razor sharp and the
absolute who-woulda-thunk-it record of the year. But when
Salem turns down the guitar and turns up the technology he
makes the best record I might imagine would ever be in him.
Dumptruck
- Lemmings Travel to the Sea (DIW):
Essential not only for the new material, but for the live
stuff culled from a smoking hot past. Ahh fuck it, see the
above again
Nitpickers
may say that the following discs have no rightful claim to
be on this list
I guess. But, being the whogivesafucker
that I am, they are. The year would have sucked a little bit
(or more likely a whole lot) more without these songs in my
ears.
Re-ish
and best-ofs:
Dream
Syndicate - Days of Wine and Roses
(Rhino):
Rhinos royal treatment of one king-hell guitar record.
This is the one that told punks that it was okay to like rock
and roll again
Dinosaur Jr. - Ear Bleeding Country:
The Best of (Rhino): Oh my - another king-hell
guitar record. J. Mascis sure can wail, but if you listen
closely, underneath the blare is some of the best pop-rock
the 80s belched out.
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